It’s been several years since the FBI moved into their new building in Prince William County, and they’ve finally gotten around to announcing that they’re interested in investigating government corruption. My, will wonders ever cease? A federal agency announces it has an interest in doing its job? What a shocker, I know.
In hopes that there’s actual interest on the part of the FBI in investigating and prosecuting government corruption, a good friend of mine has compiled a fairly extensive list of documented instances where government officials in Prince William County have diverted taxpayer funds for their own personal benefit they might be able to use to get the ball rolling.
ITEM 1: $5,000 in county funds for Hylton Performing Arts Center “Save A Seat” Campaign with the names of Supervisor Maureen Caddigan and her deceased son engraved on separate plaques. This amount entitles one to:
Private use of the Lovey Hammel Lounge (non-performance only)
Invitation to special, VIP events and receptions
“Take a Seat!” Your name on a seat in the orchestra of Merchant Hall
Annual access to the Lovey Hammel Lounge prior to Hylton Presents performances and during intermissions
Concierge ticket and seating assistance via the annual giving and membership office
Eight complimentary beverage coupons to be used for Hylton Center refreshments
Complimentary Hylton Presents series event CD
Your name in lights on the Didlake Grand Foyer marquee listing of Hylton Center supporters; updated bi-annually
A personal backstage tour for six
Invitation to Friends-only special events and receptions
Friends of the Hylton Center Chico bag
Priority processing of Hylton Presents subscriptions
Recognition within the Hylton Presents performance programs
Personalized Friends of the Hylton Center lapel pin and membership card
Access to Friends hospitality area during select Hylton Presents performances
Invitation to Hylton Presents season preview
Subscription to the Hylton Performing Arts Center e-newsletter
ITEM 2: Another $5,000 - $10,000 in county funds from Supervisor Wally Covington to the Hylton Performing Arts Center for “Cornerstone Partner” personal status. (Covington is up for a judgeship)
ITEM 3: $600 in county or campaign funds for Marine Corps Museum memorial bricks with the names of Supervisor Maureen Caddigan and her husband engraved on separate bricks.
ITEM 4: $200 in county funds for Marine Corps Museum memorial bricks with the names of Supervisor John Jenkins and his wife engraved on a brick.
ITEM 5: $1,300 in county funds for the Steak ‘N Stake Awards Banquet including Supervisor Maureen Caddigan’s purchase of an ad in the program that used her campaign slogan in the ad.
ITEM 6: Use of Chairman Corey Stewart’s county employee Laurie Cronin and Supervisor Maureen Caddigan’s county employee Jane Beyer (who also doubled as her campaign manager) on county time in county facilities using county equipment for campaign purposes.
ITEM 7: Conversion of at least $5,000 from Supervisor Maureen Caddigan’s political campaign for personal use through sham salary payments to her husband.
ITEM 8: Use of $1,000 in county funds each for Supervisors Wally Covington, Maureen Caddigan, Marty Nohe, Mike May, John Jenkins and Frank Principi to be named personally as “Red Cross Heroes”.
This ought to help the FBI keep productively busy for about a week. Since so many others have already done the job of uncovering all the evidence for them, they ought to be rather efficient at bringing charges, prosecuting, and putting these corrupt officials in jail.
Let’s see if they’re actually interested in doing their job, or whether announcing that they’re interested in getting crime tips is just some public affairs employee getting confused about what the FBI does these days and going off the reservation.
The opinions expressed here are solely the views of the author, and not representative of the position of any organization, political party, doughnut shop, knitting guild, or waste recycling facility, but may be correctly attributed to the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy. If anything in the above article has offended you, please click here to receive an immediate apology.
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