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Some Announcements

By Greg L | 1 April 2007 | Humor & Satire | 4 Comments

Inspired by the story in yesterday’s MJM regarding Rep. Howard “Judge” Smith, I’ve decided to follow in Rep. Smith’s footsteps. When Rep. Smith didn’t like a particular piece of legislation, he’d put the bill in his pocket and go back to his farm. Now that’s a real man! With a real name! What sounds more steadfast and reliable than “Howard Smith?” Look at what’s happened here in Prince William County — where have all the real names gone? We find ourselves surrounded by Faisals, Lundbergs, Gaffneys, Suhails, Norquists, Khans and MAHBOOBS (I’m not making this stuff up!) Not “Yorboobs” but “Mahboobs” - they’re everywhere. Where have all the good old normal names like Smith and Letiecq gone?

They’ve gone the way of Rep. Howard Smith, a true Conservative DEMOCRAT. In order to truly embrace my conservatism, I intend to return to the conservative roots in the commonwealth, the Democratic party.

The timing of my epiphany couldn’t have been better. This morning, I received a summary judgment that Steve Chapman has been granted against me. Until this latest attempt to sidetrack my blogging is resolved, my family and me must (temporarily, I hope) leave our home to satisfy the judgment.

Now that I’m a Virginia Democrat, I couldn’t call a liberal Republican for a place to stay. I needed a big bleeding heart Democrat to take us in. Greg Bouchillon came to mind so I called him. He was understandably reluctant at first, but after I explained that I was a Democrat (I left out the Virginia part) he said, “Come on in!”

You know, you really shouldn’t judge a person until you’ve moved your family in to their home with only two hours notice. I completely had Greg pegged all wrong. As we were hanging my monogrammed “Greg” towels next to his monogrammed “Greg” towels, we realized we have something in common! He’s a dedicated follower of Dr. Phil and explained to me that we just had an “aha moment.” There I sat, sobbing on the side of his bathtub, as he and I made the decision to follow these common threads to see where they may lead.

Greg helped me come to terms with the fact that it wouldn’t be fair to my wife and kids to be shelved while we explore our feelings for one another. Compassionate DemocratICS (thank you, Greg!) that we are, we dropped them off at a shelter. I wouldn’t want them to be targets in my campaign for Gainesville District Supervisor, anyway.

So thank you, Steve Chapman. Thank you for finally giving me the “little nudge” I needed. We want to thank you in person, over drinks so please come see us. Just look for Greg(2) on the mailbox.

UPDATE: In case you might not have noticed, this was an April Fools prank that involved more than just BVBL. It would have run on April 1st, had that not been Palm Sunday, a day on which a few of the participants weren’t posting. This post was actually written by Southside blogger badrose, and I grit my teeth pretty hard posting this one under my name. I think I’ll be more judicious about using the phrase “I’m sure whatever you decide will be fine” around her in the future…

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  1. Riley, Not O'Reilly said on 2 Apr 2007 at 11:20 am:
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    Nice April Fool’s, Greg.

  2. badrose said on 2 Apr 2007 at 6:24 pm:
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    Shoulda known we couldn’t fool him, Greg! He knows one of your pranks when he sees it!

  3. Alton Foley (I'm Not Emeril, if you prefer) said on 2 Apr 2007 at 6:38 pm:
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    If that doesn’t work out Greg, perhaps a move to Charlottesville would be in order.

  4. badrose » I know art when I see it said on 2 Apr 2007 at 6:42 pm:
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    […] Alton did a great job impersonating me (it’s not easy being me!)   To see what I did to poor Greg, go here! […]

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